So I’ve decided that I need to start being more authentic and staying true to myself. This means in one aspect besides meditating, starting to use oracle and tarot cards again to help gain a glimpse of what the universe is trying to tell me. I’ve realized that over the past (let’s say) decade I’ve ignored my intuition and gut feelings on numerous occasions. By doing this I’ve found myself on a path that I can truthfully say I probably shouldn’t be on, and now I need to make the leap, or at least start forging the path back to the one I should be on.

Last week I decided I would order a couple different oracle card sets (and I’ve also recently ordered a couple different tarot card sets that should be showing up sometime next week). I’ve been trying to a reading at least every other night or so, and Friday night, I decided I’d do a duel three card reading from the two sets of oracle cards that I have.

From the first set (enchanted spell oracle) I pulled the luxury, clarity, and intellect cards.

Then from the second set (flowers of the night oracle) I pulled the passion, awaken, and restore cards.

The meanings of the cards are as followed (from the enchanted spell oracle deck): The luxury card symbolizes that my life could use a little more joy right now. The clarity card symbolizes that I have a big undertaking ahead of me that requires my absolute focus, and that I need to write down every step I need to take in order to accomplish this goal (or undertaking). The intellect card symbolizes that I need to be using my head not my heart in making decisions (i.e. applying logic to the situation and not just reacting).

From the flowers of the night deck: the passion card symbolizes the possibility of new relationships, or basically anything that can bring a spark to my soul (hobby turning into a career, or a new perspective that changes a current position on something). The awaken card symbolizes my acknowledgement that I still have much to learn if I want to transition into industry, plus much to learn in terms of different hobbies. The restore card is symbolizing that a change is coming for me, and that it will be beneficial in the long run, all I have to do is accept and reflect back on the cycles that have brought me to my current position (and know what needs to be fixed to insure that those cycles aren’t continuously repeated).

So all these cards were basically spot on based on how my last week had been going. I probably can use a little more joy in my life—I seem to be stuck in the work, no play mindset right now; or I should say the work, try to recharge, back to work mindset. I’ve realized that by the time Friday rolls around my mental/metaphysical/emotional battery is pretty close to being totally empty, and it does basically take the weekend to recharge it to almost full just to then get depleted during another week at work. I am trying to transition into an industry position, so I probably should make a detailed plan on how that is going to happen, and I need to make the decision on the career path mainly with my head and not my heart. Though with this—I’m also trying to stick with the idea that “if something isn’t a hell yes, then it’s a no”. Staying within my comfort zone has shown me that research hasn’t always been a hell yes for me, and therefore I should have moved it to the no column long ago. I’ve also decided that just because I’m out of school, I shouldn’t just quit trying to learn things (I know I did that for awhile, just to “take a breather from school” but hadn’t realized how long I let the attitude go on for). So I do have numerous e-courses that I am still working my way through. Also a change in careers in coming; whether it’s a straight transition into an industry position, or a transition into industry with a small stop in unemployment again that remains to be seen.

So I’m going to start paying more attention to my hunches, feelings, and daydreams—while trying to avoid all the negative self talk that I sometimes find myself falling into. I know now with hundred percent certainty that I’m done with academia (though I will miss working with students), and that I need to focus more on the transition into industry.