So the May full moon was a couple of days ago—and it was also the last “super full moon” for 2020 as well (it was the milk super moon). As I’ve mentioned in several posts, I’ve realized that I’m not really handling this whole global pandemic as well as I thought I was—before it had been classified as a pandemic, I was a little more engaged in both personal & professional development, as well as trying to figure out what I was going to be doing with my life. Though last month, I really didn’t do a whole lot of that—there was some personal/professional development but not nearly as much as what I had been doing the month or two before hand. I’m going to try to get on top of the bad habits (which is mainly delaying doing something because I don’t feel like doing it currently—or having some other negative emotion attached to it) over the next month or so.
So while the notice has been given that things are opened—this girl is still going to be doing social isolation, mainly because I don’t believe that we’re actually over the hump of the pandemic. I won’t be surprised if there is a spike of cases daily/weekly throughout out the summer. If there aren’t spikes, that will be nice—but the virus will probably make a second showing in the fall.
So moving back to the full moon, this week it had transitioned in (and now out of) the Scorpio constellation. Since I’m doing social isolation—this is a good time to reflect on questions that we can ask during this time:
Have I been jealous, vengeful, suspicious, or otherwise behaved toxically?
Have I been living out of fear rather than joy?
Have I been brooding and dark: focusing on the negative rather than the positive?
Have I been cruel and cunning?
Am I having the sex I need to feel good about myself (of course some people need no sex at all to feel good about themselves)?
If I were to number the above questions 1-5, my answers would be as follows:
- I don’t think I have been acting jealous, vengeful, or suspicious of anyone. Currently I’m more in awe of people who seem to actually have their cards together and are moving forward (whereas I’m more of wondering if I’m going to have to play 56-card pick-up beforehand). But I will be honest that I have been acting somewhat toxic towards myself—mainly in that I’ve allowed myself to quit working out and have been eating way to much not-good-for-me food.
- Yeah, I would say that currently I probably have been living a little more out of fear than out of joy. This is in part due to the pandemic—I’m trying not to turn into a complete germophobe, and I would say that I’m currently holding at ~50% (so probably average for the current global pandemic).
- Again, I think this is a semi-yes and again based on the current world events. It is hard at times to find the silver lining in the clouds, when there are idiots running the show that are killing thousands of people a day.
- This is an easy one to answer—no I have not been cruel and cunning.
- This answer is also a no—but mainly because I’m not in a relationship with anyone. Currently I’m trying to get my own life in order and I’m not in the mindset to deal with someone else while trying to figure things out (the only beings I really want to have to take into account for figuring out my life are my pets and to a slightly less degree—my immediate family).
The moon then also moved through my first house (or my Image zone), as I usually work with my rising sign (which happens to be Scorpio; my sun sign is Virgo & my moon sign is Pisces). This house/sign is focused on yourself (personal &/or professional life).
I think that this transition came around at a good time this year—I’m not really focused on myself (in regards to really either my personal or professional life), and that is something that I need to work on changing. I’ve noticed over the last month, that I get really good at finding other things to do other than the one or two things I really should be doing—chores instead of doing professional development, re-reading a particular book series instead of reading through some personal development books. This is something that I really need focus and work on over then next couple of months. I’ve also realized that it also ties back to the fact that I’ve acknowledged the fact that I’m still stuck in the fear zone.
So what are a few goals that I can work on over the next few weeks to help bring myself back towards all my other goals?
Reflect and actually decide what I would like to accomplish over say the next fifteen to twenty years (large goals and then develop ideas on breaking them down to smaller goals).
Set up a new 12-month schedule/planner/idea—similar to what one can do during the Aries full/new moon (but doing this since I’ve started my “new” full-house cycle).
Get back into a workout routine. I had been doing well with Morning Meltdown 100, so I will probably start this program back up—if I stick with it, I will finish it sometime in mid-August).
And above all remember—Aim for progress and not for perfection.